I have a love-hate relationship with the idea of DISCIPLINE…. and frankly so do many of my clients and the coaches I work with. It is a hard word to swallow- it feels so rigid and unforgiving and punishing. As health coaches, we are trained to instill more gentle language when dealing with ourselves and our clients, especially when we lack the discipline we say we so deeply desire to move ourselves toward our goals. This is never so true as when our goals involve self-care. We still fall to the bottom of the list.
We know accountability is key for ourselves as well as for our clients and yet we often talk about the creation of "rituals" and "practices" vs using the word discipline. We offer a level of forgiveness to our clients when things go awry, letting them a bit off the hook when they fall off track. If we are farther along in our own work, we can forgive ourselves more than we used to rather than constantly beating oursleves up for falling short.
It is critical as coaches that we explore our relationship with Accountability and Self-DISCIPLINE.. notice where we are a resistant ourselves and be in a coaching relationship where we ourselves are being held accountable.
Here is a Quantum reframe that struck a chord with me and has changed the way I will look at Self-DISCIPLINE from now on. Perhaps it will help shift your own resistances, should you have them.
I have come to see that there really are some non-negotiable practices we must develop (even if imperfectly so) in order to move us toward our goals. If we tell ourselves the full, hard truth….. we will not change careers, get the clients, write the book, look the weight or engage in more self care unless we have a clear intention and then act to take the necessary steps to make it happen. Taking those necessary steps in a consistent fashion will move you forward.
In truth, if you clearly know what you want, there is no time to waste on waiting for tomorrow to begin. You want to produce a certain outcome you want to aim to be on track more often than offtrack.. and that takes DISCIPLINE…
I was pondering my own feelings about this word and why I did not particularly ever like it. Then, I began to think about the root of the word DISCIPLINE… sounded to me like DISCIPLE…. and this is not a religion lesson by any means… But I started thinking about the characteristics I associate with the word DISCIPLE.
Off the top of my head, a DISCIPLE is a believer so in touch with their love and passion for a cause, teacher, spiritual leader, God- by whatever name you may employ- that they would go anywhere and possibly do anything in order to be connected with the subject of their desire….
So now I ask you to reflect.. how passionate about your goals and your self care are you that you could become a DISCIPLE of your wellbeing? Not in a self-centered way, but in a SOUL-CENTERED way. In a way that supports you so that you can in turn create and be of service in the way you are called to be in the world?
I propose in this year of Soul-Centered Self-Care in Quantum Coaching that you become a disciple of your own self… expressing the love you have for yourself, and then those you care most about and then the work through which you serve others… by unwaveringly following your most preciously held beliefs about the way you want to live, laugh, love, be, and heal the world.
Connect with others who are like minded to remind yourself of the path you are on… and look at who is co-journeying to your right and to your left. It is easier to care for ourselves when we know others in our midst are committed to the same. Find a buddy to hold you accountable and up your DISCIPLE-SHIP!
Now, with new eyes and Beginner's Mind.. I look at discipline not as something I HAVE to do.. but something I happily do with my whole heart because I see it brings me closer to who I am, closer to where I want to be, and closer to all of you in the world I am so delighted to share this path with. The resistance fallen away, now there is nothing left but to see this as a tool to be fully present, go for it, take it all to the next level and not settle for anything less… than giving my all.
